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Tuesday, November 18, 2008

This Just In... [stop]

Date: Wednesday, November 12, 2008, 8:02 PM

In a message dated 11/12/2008 6:42:00 PM Eastern Standard Time, antonedavis, Marthasville, MO sends telegram:

> Date: Tuesday, November 11, 2008, 10:46 AM > A cowboy > > > > A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote > mountainous > pasture in Missouri when suddenly a brand-new BMW > advanced out of > a dust cloud towards him. >[stop] > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, > RayBan > sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the > cowboy, > "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you > have in your > herd, Will you give me a calf?" > [stop]

> Bud looks at the man, then looks at his > peacefully > grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" > > > The dude parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook > computer, connects > it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA > page on the > Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact > fix on his > location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that > scans the > area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. >[stop]

> The dude then opens the digital photo in Adobe > Photoshop and exports > it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany >[stop]

> Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that > the image has > been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an > MS-SQL database > through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on > his Blackberry > and, after a few minutes, receives a response. >[stop]

> Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his > hi-tech, > miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the > cowboy and > says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves." >[stop]

> "That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of > my calves," says Bud. > > He watches the young man select one of the animals and > looks on amused as > the young man pushes and prods it into the back seat of his car. >[stop]

> Then the Bud says to the dude, "Hey, if I can > tell you exactly what > your business is, will you give me back my calf?" >[stop]

> The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, > "Okay, why > not?" > > "You're a Congressman for the U.S. > Government", says Bud. > > "Wow! That's correct," says the dude, > "but how did you guess that?" >[stop]

> "No guessing required," answered Bud the cowboy. > "You showed up here even > though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an > answer I already > knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how > much smarter > than me you are; and you don't know a thing about > cows...this is a > herd of sheep. . > > Now give me back my dog. > > > >[stop]

A shout out to Marthasville where the chickens are very clean, Martha Boone is buried there, the organist at the COC is a German girl, and the pastor's wife is Cuban. Thanks, antonedavis, for that information. We will sure look into the incident just as soon as we figure out who you are. MooPig Editors

2 comments:

d2r2 said...

Don't try to figure this one out.
It's code. The name is Ant "1" Davi's cave dwellers. He mans a 50 caliber mounted in the back of a 1972 Toyota pick-up near the Pakistan border. That elaborate electronic hook-up is a signal.
Everyone duck.

MooPig said...

Ant 1, Ant 1; this is ank p... Burn Fat (Not Calories) - Try Free SkinnyBoost - FDA and FTC Approved

roger out will call thursday and friday for translation directions

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